I know— [ The answer comes quick, hasty, accompanied by a stab of guilt. He doesn't really want, or need, to have this conversation again, any more than she does. And she thinks he's still upset about it, about missing out on the ARK. ]
I know. That's not what I meant, I just don't know how—
[ It's not even just that he's human now, without it, or that there's an ARK's worth of people just in this building. When he'd put all his hope in it, he'd bargained with the WAU — it could have the Earth, what was left of it, if he could just launch the ARK. And he'd bargained again, senselessly, the moment Catherine's screen went black. The other Simon could have the ARK if he could undo what he'd just done.
He steps forward and puts a hand on her arm as he speaks, the words accompanied by a stab of guilt. It's supposed to be a comforting gesture, not broadcast said stab of guilt like a feelings picnic. Nor his desperate relief at her presence, the unanchored confusion and insecurity. The substratum of a massive grief, confused and nebulous, the loss he never saw the beginning or the edges of. Just the sudden absence of everything, the chasm it left behind. Like Catherine said time felt, in the Omnitool; omitted. Missing. Like a cage containing something he doesn't know the shape of, just that it's too dangerous to open. ]
no subject
I know. That's not what I meant, I just don't know how—
[ It's not even just that he's human now, without it, or that there's an ARK's worth of people just in this building. When he'd put all his hope in it, he'd bargained with the WAU — it could have the Earth, what was left of it, if he could just launch the ARK. And he'd bargained again, senselessly, the moment Catherine's screen went black. The other Simon could have the ARK if he could undo what he'd just done.
He steps forward and puts a hand on her arm as he speaks, the words accompanied by a stab of guilt. It's supposed to be a comforting gesture, not broadcast said stab of guilt like a feelings picnic. Nor his desperate relief at her presence, the unanchored confusion and insecurity. The substratum of a massive grief, confused and nebulous, the loss he never saw the beginning or the edges of. Just the sudden absence of everything, the chasm it left behind. Like Catherine said time felt, in the Omnitool; omitted. Missing. Like a cage containing something he doesn't know the shape of, just that it's too dangerous to open. ]