had to have high hopes for a living —

[evite]

WHO: cassian andor (evasives), daisy johnson (evite), illya kuryakin (kgbs), & jyn erso (realists)
WHERE: the barbie dream house
WHEN: approximately october 31ish
WHAT: dinner? a movie? bickering? they're children.
NOTES OR WARNINGS: rated pg-13 for inappropriate language.

Comments

[kgbs]

My childhood was too long ago to remember that.

[ nonsense. he remembered nearly everything with a starling clarity. there were some things that he had made himself forget but that was different. ]

You are all much younger than I am.

[ he was so old. ]

[evite]

Okay, grandpa.

[ so old and so cranky. ]

How's Denise? [ d-nice? dennys? ] I'm surprised you didn't invite him over for dinner.

[realists]

[ first of all illya

fuck u.

second of all ]

Has he given you more sex cacti?

[kgbs]

[ he ignores daisy's insult. honestly, he's very used to those. he loves you too, sweetheart. ]

The what?

[ jyn's question actually makes him stop what he's doing and step out of the kitchen to stare at her. ]

That's not what they are.

[realists]

Not from you to me, sure. But why do you think he is giving them to you, Kuryakin?

[ she gestures idly from cassian's direction to illya's. ]

Cassian, tell him I'm right.

[evasives]

[ sex cacti. he almost laughs. but she's probably not... wrong. d-nice continues hoping his plants will surely win him a threesome one day. ]

[ cassian shrugs, because he won't disagree. ]

I suppose they could just be flirting cacti. [ flirting with a very explicit purpose in mind. ]

[kgbs]

They are just cacti. There is no ulterior motive behind them. You are all too paranoid.

[ he was moving out.

...after he finished this dinner. ]

They are just plants. [ they were. they absolutely were just stupid green plants that he was going to throw at people if they kept talking about sex plants. those two words did not go together. ]

[evasives]

Illya. [ this is a very serious matter so obviously his voice is grave. ]

No one gives out that many cacti without ulterior motive. [ cassian is paranoid af but sex cacti is true af. ] Why do you think he is giving you so many? The goodness of his heart?

[evite]

He has a crush on you both.

[ not daisy and jyn, though. they were spared the sex cacti hug of death. ]

You could do worse, honestly. I bet he's loaded.

[ futuristic sugar daddy!!! ]

[realists]

[ it would be rude to say i told you so ]

I told you so.

[kgbs]

[ he dismisses all of them with a sharp sound of disdain before reaching for a pot to start throwing everything together in. ]

Regardless, he can give me all the cacti he wants. He is not coming over for dinner.

[evite]

Let him take you out for dinner, then.

[ at least long enough for daisy & cassian to go snoop in his apartment ]

[evasives]

[ they had a whole conversation about this HOW DID ILLYA NOT REALIZE?? ]

As long as we are sure Illya will not accidentally agree to more than dinner.

[ having finished up the veggies, he passes them over at last. cooking must continue. ] He keeps wanting to know if you and I are married. Was I not clear before?

[realists]

He thinks you're married? Illya's not even your type!

[ she is AFFRONTED! AND REFUSES TO THINK ABOUT WHY! she can join illya on his ship in the nile. but at the same time, she glances at daisy. ]

I guess you and I really are dating.

[evite]

[ daisy just shrugs. she could do worse. jyn can still make her money in the fighting rings. ]

Cassian, what is your type?

[ asking for a friend ]

[kgbs]

I'm not married to anybody!

[ enjoy some angry under the breath russian muttering, cassian, since you were the closest to him. ]

Yes Cassian, tell them your type. Perhaps there is another neighbor in this ridiculously ostentatious building that would like to give you gnome figurines as a gesture of their affection.

[evasives]

We know that. D-Nice does not.

[ he can't believe he's doing all the work in this fake not!relationship for d-nice. he also can't believe they keep using the man's nickname instead of dennys. ]

[ but wow what the fuck is this turnaround, how dare they ask him about himself!! he shrugs off the question. ] I do not have a type. [ A BOLD FACED LIE. ] But at least I would be aware of why I am receiving any gnomes.

[evite]

That's bullshit. [ to both of them, for the record. ]

Half the people I work with think we're already married [ don't argue she's right ] and everyone has a type.

[ hers is tall men. among other things. ]

[realists]

His type is competent, thoughtful people who challenge him, believe in fighting for change and peace, have a secret sense of humor despite an outwardly gruff appearance, and probably can kick his ass.

[ and she's just realized that she described illya. huh. ]

[evasives]

[ he whirls around to shoot jyn a baffled look.] Where is that even coming from?

[ cassian doesn't think he has a type because he's never! been with anyone! long enough to really tell!!!! ]

[ also, he can't afford to be picky when he's on a mission so!!! maybe he's never sat down to think about it!! how about them apples!! ]

[kgbs]

Do you want to be married?

[ well. it was the second time it had come up in conversation recently so he thinks it is a logical question to ask and he is typically not the type to dance around a topic.

maybe the timing isn't the best but it appear that jyn and cassian are otherwise occupied. but he is going to nudge cassian's shoulder and mutter: ] That is a good type.

[evite]

[ daisy only recognizes denial because she was the spitting image of it for so long. so she laughs at jyn's long-winded way of saying I'M YOUR TYPE YOU STUPID BITCH, only to stick her tongue out at illya in turn ]

Not to a guy in a sex cacti ring.

[realists]

[ daisy's comment draws a snort of a laugh, but she does begrudgingly answer cassian. sort of. she answers him in that she.... replies. ]

Am I wrong?

[evasives]

[ he looks at jyn for a second, maybe two, spares a fleeting thought to how she could probably kick his ass, then promptly ignores it. ]

I do not know. [ there, it's better than a blanket no statement. he genuinely has no awareness of his type because he has no awareness of feelings. ]

[kgbs]

I'll take that as a no then.

[ that's to daisy, there. because he is not going to get in the middle of whatever is happening with jyn and cassian.

except... ]

How can you not know? Have you never thought about it in regards to certain people? [ he doesn't even mean jyn but even he'd thought about certain women in that way before eventually finding someone that both suited him and could kick his ass.

it was a good type, all right. ]