[Ellie lets him draw her close, bloody or not, her skin tingling with the nearness of it, itching with the faint panic of disbelief. Her mind still keeps trying to reject that he's alive and here in front of her, holding her.
It feels like after he died, but in reverse. Before, she couldn't believe he was gone. Now, even if he's been here for some time, it's a struggle to trust her senses.
He'd hugged her after getting off the boat, and it's a jolt to realize that he smells far more like himself now than he did then. Blood and sweat, and the low murmur of his voice, more a rumble in his chest. Baby girl.
It's both comforting and not, and Ellie struggles to let herself relax, to press her face into his shoulder and let him hold her. Let him, just for a second, carry them like he used to back then. It hurts that it's impossible. They are irrevocably changed.
She both is and isn't his baby girl anymore.
But Ellie puts her arms around Joel, leans into him and holds on tight, pulling him to her, careful of skin.]
no subject
It feels like after he died, but in reverse. Before, she couldn't believe he was gone. Now, even if he's been here for some time, it's a struggle to trust her senses.
He'd hugged her after getting off the boat, and it's a jolt to realize that he smells far more like himself now than he did then. Blood and sweat, and the low murmur of his voice, more a rumble in his chest. Baby girl.
It's both comforting and not, and Ellie struggles to let herself relax, to press her face into his shoulder and let him hold her. Let him, just for a second, carry them like he used to back then. It hurts that it's impossible. They are irrevocably changed.
She both is and isn't his baby girl anymore.
But Ellie puts her arms around Joel, leans into him and holds on tight, pulling him to her, careful of skin.]
Made it through.
[Everything. Somehow.]