meadowlarklogs | Oh, what will you become?

[ When all is said and done and they're moved in, after they've had a chance to get a drink and cool off, Damian has something for her. Something he's been working on since their conversation about Krypton.

And she was there for him last night. And she matters.

He's not good with words and he shoves people away by instinct, despite how badly he wants them near. So when he approaches her it's with considerably more... shyness, than usual. Less bravado and confidence. He knocks on the door to her room. ]

... Kara? Are you busy?

No, come on in!

[ there's still a couple boxes in her room. not much, because she hasn't exactly had the time or funds to acquire a lot of stuff, but there's one or two. kara herself is sprawled out on her bed, having been playing ~~candy crush~~ a puzzle game on the implant before damian knocked. ]

What's up?

[ ... ]

I'm going to send you a file. You're going to want to run it in the living room.

[ she gives him a confused look, but stands and makes her way to the living room. once there, she opens the file. ]

So what is thi-- [ she freezes, eyes wide and breath held. ]

[ It's the best he could have done from his imagination. The environment is lushly detailed with what little he'd gleaned of kryptonian plantlife from studying what records remained. It's far enough to walk for a while, to get the full scope of the environment - and the firefalls are just as he could imagine them. Glorious and flowing, the world bright under the twin suns. And the smell of spice in the air.

Damian steps into it beside her. Trying to keep his expression blank, but watching her reaction carefully. ]

[ she inhales shakily, hand rising up to cover her mouth.

it's not perfect. how could it be, when damian's never been to her home planet? but it's close. close enough that it could easily be a part of krypton she'd just never gotten the chance to see. it's home. and she hasn't seen home in so long. her heart aches at the sight, but it's not all bad. there's grief there, yes, but so much more than just that. ]

Damian, I-- [ kara shakes her head, silent tears coursing down her cheeks. when she speaks again, it's in her mother-tongue. ] It's beautiful.

[ And here he doesn't know what to say.

He'd done it because she'd missed it. Because it wasn't fair that it had been ripped away from her. He'd done it because she was nice to him, and she reminded him of home - but in a different way. In a way that made him okay with being here. With being around her, unguarded and open. ]

I can keep adding things. And I can send you the programs I used to make it, so you can make a more accurate version.

[ she nods, not really able to get any words out.

the wonderful glimpse of home holds her attention for a moment more. then she shuts down the program. it could hold her attention for hours if she let it, but right now, she doesn't want to get too sucked in. or even more emotional than she already is.

as the firefalls fade from view, kara turns and throws her arms around damian, hiding her face in his shoulder. ]

I don't know how to thank you for this.

[ He's not wearing his usual full coverage outfit. Her arms are warm and solid and he feels her skin, and for a moment he's frozen.

Then slowly, his arms wrap around her in turn. He lets the empathy link bleed over his fondness, his happiness at her happiness. ]

[ the bittersweet ache in her chest filters though the link along with gratefulness, her own affection for him, and, after a moment, a flicker of surprise. kara knows, intellectually, that damian must like her. but knowing that is different from feeling it. from seeing what he's done for her because of it.

she pulls back, just enough to look him in the eye. to gauge his expression. a flutter of nerves and indecision pass from her mind to his as she mulls for a heartbeat and then--

she kisses him. ]

[ He means to say something. That she doesn't have to do anything, she's done more than enough. She - reminds him that he can be better, that he should try to be better. He doesn't find the words and honestly, he isn't sure he has them.

She kisses him.

But maybe, maybe, he bends to kiss her. ]

[ They're together for a heartbeat.

And then Damian's pulling back, catching himself, what he's doing. ]

K-Kara, I-

[ oh no. fear grips her gut with an icy hand. did she misread things? did she just fuck this all up? but, no, he kissed her back. there was definite reciprocation there. it can't just be her. ... right?

kara ducks her head, clearly embarrassed, and wipes her cheeks as surreptitiously as she can. (why did she think kissing him after she's been crying would be a good idea?) she smiles, but it's shaky. more a sheepish wince than anything else. ]

I'm sorry. I thought, maybe you-- [ yeah, no. she can't finish that sentence. ]

I...

[ He's frozen for a moment. Thinking of everything he's hurled at Jason and Loki. How he spent the last two days spitting and hissing at his brothers, insisting that this is temporary, this doesn't matter. Trying to shove Kate away because she's temporary too - none of this is going to last.

That was his first kiss. His face is flushed, embarrassment clear, his stoic mask knocked clearly askew and leaving him terribly exposed. He has a comeback for everything, but this has left him speechless. There are a million and one reasons this is a bad idea, but...

But for one fleeting moment, he can't think of any of them.

So he kisses her again. ]

[ she's about to try and wave everything off so she can go patch her little bit of self-esteem back together when he kisses her. a small, surprised noise catches in the back of her throat, but--

she sinks into it. presses herself close to him as she kisses him back, arms curling around his waist. the contact is enough to spark the empathy bond again. this time, there's no negative emotions in it. just relief and affection and happiness that spreads through kara's veins like warmth and sunlight.

after a moment, she pulls back. but just enough to rest her forehead against his, laughing quietly in delight. ]

[ If he's being honest - and in this moment, he has no choice but to be honest, this is the best he's felt in a long time. Even after taking a blowtorch to his reputation and to his relationships with his brothers - he's happy.

He doesn't remember the last time he was happy. Her happiness is catching, a living thing, making him feel more than the mess of parts and anger life had left him.

And then the apprehension trickles in. He pulls back. ]

We shouldn't do this.

[ talk about mixed signals.

kara can feel how happy he is, how much they're both enjoying the moment and the closeness. and she feels the apprehension creep up on him. and it's... honestly, it's not surprising. it does put a damper on her good mood, but considering how he floundered right after that first kiss? apprehension and nerves are probably to be expected. ]

Do you have a good reason why not? [ or is he just letting his emotions get the better of him? ] 'Cause I can give you a list of why we should.

We're from different worlds.

[ That comes immediately, followed by a sharp trace of fear. The concern that he'll be abandoned, though he tries desperately to squash it down.

He's aware he's not moving away, though. ]

But we're here for the foreseeable future.

[ her expression softens. she reaches up to cup his jaw in her palm, thumb gently skating over his cheekbone. ]

Everything ends, Damian. I know that better than most. [ not just because of her planet. everyone she's ever loved leaves her in one way or another. it's an oft-picked scab. an emotional wound that never quite heals. ] I'd rather take a chance and enjoy some happiness while I can than only be braced for the inevitable.

[ There are so many other reasons, Kara.

He doesn't know what he's doing. He's never had a friend, let alone a -- he doesn't know what to call this. Relationship? He'd gone out of his way to do nice things for her because she deserved them, but he knows he's still an egotistical little bastard.

She'll get sick of him.

Or his secrets will come out and she'll hate him.

But he wants it. Badly, actually. The same way he wants to play stupid games with Noctis and teach Prompto how to fight and bake. The same way he goes out of his way to spend time with Kate, allowing social calls where he'd only ever allowed himself sparring partners. The same way he wants to spend time with his brothers, despite knowing that this happiness has an expiration date. ]

Let... [ Say no. Say no. ] Let me think about it.

[ there are so many things that could go wrong with this. his paranoia could be right--damian may inadvertently end up wrecking this with secrets and assholishness. either one of them could disappear at any moment. but kara's still got hope in her that this could be good. at least for a little while.

she smiles softly, rubbing her thumb over his cheek one more time. ] Okay. [ a soft kiss is pressed to the corner of his mouth. a ghost of a touch. ] Take whatever time you need. I'll be here.

[ He manages an almost smile. And then he's pulling back and away, putting that careful distance back up.

He let her in almost immediately because she's Clark's family. She was a piece of home that he was sorely missing, even if she wasn't the right piece or person. The one he never got. Now he thinks that this is biting him in the ass, he let her get too close. Let himself get too close.

Now it's time to beat a hasty retreat and figure out what the hell to do about it. ]

I've got things to do tomorrow, so... goodnight.

Oh, what will you become?

KARA

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