meadowlarklogs | ( catch all )

[ carolina is nothing if not a creature of habit and it means she tries to keep her workouts on the most consistent schedules possible. there are small variations week by week, but since the monster invasion, she's doubled down on making sure she's not letting herself become complacent.

just because a threat's not constant doesn't mean it won't still kick her ass if she's not prepared for it. nor can she count on a threat to spare wash and maine by chance; she needs to make sure they're prepared, too.

so this is part of their routine, her teammates readying themselves while carolina's attention is the other way, arms up beside her head as she readjusts the pins keeping her bangs out of her face.

which means there's little in the way of warning before someone approaching catches carolina's attention and she gives them a little nod, hands dropping as she greets, ]

Ephemera. Glad you could make it.

[ So. They're doing this. Ephemera's more than half convinced it's going to blow up in his face in some mysterious, horrible way, but he still shows up. He's dressed in his regular workout clothes, his hands carefully wrapped and a hood pulled up over his scars.

No armor. That felt like a step too far. Maybe one day, if they don't kill each other first. ]

Yeah.

[ His tone is flat, a little tense. He exhales slowly, forcing his hands to unclench. ]

Sorry. I'm trying.

[ Wash is caught off guard by Ephemera joining them -- Carolina didn't tell him, and a quick glance to Maine confirms that he didn't know either. Well... it's okay with him, but he has to school the surprise off of his face. He drops the leg he was stretching and turns to greet the other man himself.

Ephemera sounds tense, and that's not surprising, but what he says next is. That he's trying. And Wash certainly knows what that's like. He smiles faintly and steps forward, lifting one hand in a wave. ]

Good to see you.

[ It's the truth. Even if his nerves are a little on edge, his paranoia wondering if Ephemera just took the invitation to learn their fighting styles better, he isn't going to begrudge someone who's trying to get along. Who wants something more than bloodshed between them. Maybe if Ephemera's around them more, he'll understand better. ]

Try not to kick my ass too hard, okay?

[ Maine isn't so quick to wipe the surprise from his face. It's subdued, as most of Maine's expressions are: just widened eyes, slightly raised eyebrows, and a lingering stare. But from Maine, he may as well be slack-jawed and sputtering.

When his surprise does clear, it's replaced with confusion. That's subdued as well: a furrowed brow and a set to his jaw that says, "What the fuck?" He looks first at Wash, who appears to be surprised but rolling with it. Then he looks at Carolina — and that look, he holds. Silently asking, "What's going on?"

Unlike his teammates, Maine doesn't give Ephemera a friendly greeting. He's too bewildered by Ephemera's presence to do that. ]

[ it's not until maine has that questioning look for her that carolina realizes that she's never actually brought this up. she was assuming she had, but the last few weeks have been busy.

she has the grace to wince a little as she meets maine's gaze, holding a hand up level with her waist, palm down, a request for him to hold, and hopefully he takes it to be a suggestion of at ease. ]

I thought there were worse ideas in the world than having another ex-ODST to train with.

[ carolina takes a step away, then, gesturing at a nearby pathway. she's not really leading this, but almost acting like she is a habit she's never really been able to shake. ]

That loop is a little over a mile. We can start with a run?

[ and, if maine needs, she can answer his questions once they're moving. ]

[ Ephemera twitches, eying his surroundings. All the Freelancers. He's outnumbered. Badly. He's got knives and a baton on him, but if the moment turns, its' going to turn against him.

Breathe. Don't act like a crazy person. ]

Yeah.

[ They can run. They can be reasonable about this. ]

[ Wash catches Carolina's gesture to Maine, and decides he should try to give them a little room so she can explain to him if he needs it. He gestures to Ephemera to start the run with him. ]

Let's go. I'll race you.

[ Just a friendly run, that's all this is. They're going to have to learn to trust one another if they're ever going to get along properly. If they're going to understand each other. ]

[ The signal to hold is one that Maine obeys. He doesn't pick up on the second part — the unstated suggestion that he should be at ease. But maybe that's a good thing. He might've complied on the surface, but below, it would've prompted the opposite reaction.

Wash suggests racing Ephemera. Maine recognizes it was a way to give Carolina and himself some room. He's surprised that Wash is rolling with this so wholeheartedly, but there's no space to ask about it.

Once they get moving and Wash and Ephemera are out of earshot, Maine speaks up. ]

Said he hasn't learned his "revenge is a waste of time" lesson.

[ There's an edge to his words — Carolina's words, quoted back. That Maine speaks without prompting may reveal more than his tone. This is something he considers urgent. Something that he feels the need to take action on, one way or the other. ]

Edited (clarification) 2020-10-15 13:48 (UTC)

[ for the umpteenth time, carolina's beyond grateful that she doesn't have to explain herself to wash, that he'll do what she needs before she can ask. she reminds herself to thank him later while maine actually starts the conversation about ephemera, at her side. that's plenty telling. ]

I was mistaken. He's learned it, just... needs some practice. Like the rest of us.

[ she relates to ephemera more than she lets on, with all the little things they've shared with one another, mostly accidentally or as deliberate peace offerings. bits and pieces of what makes them tick, what makes her so defensive and him so angry.

over time, carolina's started to think of him more and more as a reliable ally, even if they're still a long way off from friends. ]

[ "Like the rest of us," Carolina says, and Maine wonders who she's talking about. Wash and herself, he guesses. Because as far as Maine is concerned, revenge is no waste of time. It's perfectly acceptable. It's something that's shaped the course of his life; it's the root of much of his anger and hatred.

He doesn't argue with her choice of words — but he does argue. ]

Shouldn't practice while seeing us train.

[ And that choice of words is revealing, too. "Seeing us train," not "training with us." A window into black-and-white thinking in which people are neatly divided into Us and Them.

To Maine, training is something done with proven allies, not erstwhile enemies. People who are 'practicing' not killing his teammates shouldn't be anywhere near it. ]

[ that word choice tells her more about maine's opinion of this development than almost anything else could— and that means that her correction comes quick and firm. ]

He's training with us, not observing. If you're not comfortable with it, I'll drill with you alone later.

[ The correction is less a sting and more of a stab. Maine immediately falls silent, his jaw clenched tight against any sound that might try to slip out. He doesn't nod, shake his head, or give any sign of acknowledgment. He just goes silent.

If Carolina speeds up to join the others, Maine will do the same. If she doesn't, he'll continue at his current pace. In either case, he doesn't intend to say anything else while they run. He'll continue the argument within the confines of his head. ]

[ carolina waits, makes herself count to ten before she accepts that she isn't going to get a response out of maine. he's not splitting off though, so he didn't like her explanation, but not enough to call the situation a threat. she'll take what she can get. ]

We can talk about this later. [ the "can" is deliberate, carolina offering a talk, not telling him that they're having one. usually, she'd be confident that maine understood the nuance. right now, she feels like she needs to highlight it, just in case. ] If you want.

[ this time, she doesn't wait for a response, just picks up her pace to close the distance wash and ephemera have already put between themselves and the way she'd hung back with maine. she winds up a few steps behind wash, following the pace already being set. not overtaking, tempting though it may be. not until she confirms that maine is keeping up, isn't heading in a different direction altogether. ]

[ Ephemera doesn't like running. It's something he's good at out of necessity, but not a task he enjoys or finds himself craving when he's not doing it. He runs every day to keep himself in fighting shape and that's just fucking that.

This isn't any different, really. Or it won't be if he holds his shit together.

This is fine.

This is really not fine.

He puts his head down and focuses on running. They're racing, supposedly. Him and Washington. Like that fucking matters. ]

[ Wash isn't a huge fan of running either, but actually having someone to engage with makes it better. And Carolina can run circles around him, so he's hopeful when he and Ephemera start out that they'll be more evenly matched. But even with the other man's hood up, he can make out that something's wrong. It's in his posture, he's tense and uncomfortable, and Wash is at a loss what to do about it. He calls out when he's passing, hoping to get a camaraderie in this. ]

On your right!

[ Intentionally on his right, so that Ephemera can see him. Maybe that'll help? That he's putting some consideration in? He doesn't know how to make this better besides if they keep doing it. ]

[ On the flip side, Maine enjoys running. He used to restrict how much he did, knowing that too much cardio would burn off calories necessary for bulking up. But ever since altering his training regimen to allow for speed as well as strength, he's found pleasure in running again.

This particular run is a different story. Maine isn't enjoying himself at all. How could he?

He keeps pace with Carolina, willing to follow her lead for the moment. He says nothing; his face is impassive; any tells in his posture are disguised by his movements.

At least the mile-long loop won't take long for a group of Marines. ]

[ carolina knows there's a tension in the others, but knows there's not much she can do about it, either. a portion of it is inevitably her fault, because in hindsight, she should have made sure she had a conversation about this with wash and maine before. and even if she could push a surprise like this out of the way and act like it had been the plan all along, she knows how completely she shuts her feelings off with a response like that. knows how much it isolates her.

so it's not surprising that this isn't a comfortable experience, all told, but she's learned a lesson.

for the full duration of the run, carolina hangs back to keep beside maine, the pace far slower than she'd usually take a run this length at. she stays intentionally quiet, too, until they've stopped. ]

Anyone have any preferences on what's up next?

[ it sounds casual, barely out of breath, like carolina's usual token offer to let other people make decisions, even if she's ready to do it herself. basically, she's not acknowledging everyone's obvious discomfort. ]

[ For the entirety of the run, Maine continues the argument in his head. But he only has himself to debate with. He only has his own observations, his own experiences, his own beliefs. So when they come to a halt, it's no surprise that his opinion hasn't budged.

This is a bad idea. A potentially dangerous one. But evidently, Maine's opinion doesn't matter: he can like it or leave it. He can suck it up or bow out. He can allow Ephemera to gain intel on all the Freelancers, or he can keep his own skills under wraps.

The decision is easy to make.

They stop where they started. A nearby path leads toward one of the park's many entrances and exits — the one closest to Carolina and Wash's apartment. Maine gives Carolina a curt nod — a belated acknowledgment of her words — then turns and jogs off. ]

[ Ephemera doesn't say a fucking word. This feels like a mistake, possibly even a trap he's walked himself into willingly. He touches his knuckles to his mouth when he slows, checking his breathing. Thinking about Hunter. ]

This was a bad idea.

[ He drops his hand abruptly. He should go, too. ]

[ Wash watches Maine's back, having a pretty good idea what the larger man is thinking of them. Then Ephemera speaks, and when Wash glances back it's clear he's going to bolt too. If it's an act it's a thoroughly convincing one, and he isn't sure Ephemera's capable of that from what they've seen. He could be. It's a gamble, but Wash looks to Carolina and back at Ephemera, and shakes his head. ]

I don't think it was.

[ Without another word he moves into his usual bodyweight exercises, wanting to work his arms a bit. Ephemera can leave or follow suit, Wash won't put pressure on him to stay, but he does want to give this a chance. ]

[ for as easily as carolina had welcomed ephemera's presence, how quickly she'd accepted maine's discomfort, him leaving still throws her for a moment. still has her watching maine go with an expression that looks decidedly lost, by the standards of how composed she usually keeps herself.

she shakes it off as quickly as she can, though, attention turning to ephemera as she raises her hands to stretch out her back, fingers laced together to give them something to do. ]

I don't think it was, either. Maine is just... stubborn, sometimes.

[ most of the time, technically speaking, but it's rare that his stubbornness significantly affects carolina. the original issues with his power aside, it's usually not directed her way. this is a harsh reminder of just how much she prefers it that way. ]

[ Ephemera wavers, checking his sightlines. Maine's on the way out, but he could double back. Swing around with a weapon, or just a different angle. Wouldn't be hard at all. He doesn't know what he expected coming here, but pieces of this feel inevitable.

But it hasn't turned violent yet. He thinks it'd be easier if it had. If there'd been blood on the ground. At least then he would have known how to react.

He exhales sharply, pushing his hood off. ]

No sparring.

[ They already agreed to that, him and Carolina, but it bears repeating. He thinks that part is important, that they don't turn it into a fight. Not even for training. ]

[ Hopefully it won't turn violent, Wash hopes, but what Ephemera says next seems to guarantee it. He nods once, continuing slow and thorough stances. ]

No sparring, got it. I could do without getting my ass kicked today, anyway.

[ carolina gives ephemera a firm nod, still agreeing to that rule. maybe she'll press it, some day, but that day is still a long way off.

and wash's comment is a much better point to pay attention to, anyway. she flashes him a little smirk, grateful both for his presence and for what an easy target he can be. ]

You know I can still kick your ass later, right?

[ because she's great at this flirting thing, clearly.

but for now, there's no sparring. just a series of exercises and minimal conversation, never getting entirely comfortable, but carolina thinks they made progress on that front, so she's first to announce that she has to call it a day and go home to get ready for work. it's earlier than strictly necessary, wash will know, but she's trying to keep things amicable. trying to keep ephemera from leaving like maine did.

so she's on the ground, folded over one outstretched leg, fingers catching the toe of her sneaker. a little extra stretching, keeping her flexible. and she shares a look with wash, seeking some sort of confirmation before her attention's on ephemera. ]

Hey, thanks for joining us.

[ it's simple, deliberately nonchalant. but she really does appreciate him trying. ]

[ So, they train. It's tense and pieces of it feel uneasy, but they never resort to violence. They train and that's just that.

Pieces of it remind him a little of running with his team. Ephemera isn't sure what he thinks about that, what he's supposed to think about that.

He tries to push it aside. That seems safest. He keeps his distance when he's stretching at the end, both of them out of his blindspot.

He doesn't bolt, though. So maybe that counts for something. ]

It was a good workout.

[ His tone is soft, a little distant. But he means it. ]

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