meadowlarklogs | those who died are justified;

Entry tags:

those who died are justified;

WHO: jason todd + various
WHERE: ~~everywhere~~
WHEN: August 9th-16th ish
WHAT: grungefest dates, disappointing siblings, ruining markus' life, etc etc
NOTES OR WARNINGS: booze, bad flirting / vague discussion of torture, murder, and child abuse in damian's thread

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I had to find something to do on house arrest.

[That might be true- but that hadn't been why he'd tasked Stephanie with collecting a jacket of Jason's. Why he'd tasked her with getting a specific colour of thread or a needle made for piercing thicker material. It isn't why he'd stayed up late, and stayed still longer than he ever does, trying to get it done, without it looking the least bit sloppy- in the days leading up to his birthday.

His fingers curl in, just briefly. As if it would make a lick of difference, or like Jason would pretend he hadn't seen, as if Dick could unacknowledged the numerous times he'd misjudged the where and the how deep and the angles, and stabbed himself directly into the pads of his fingers.

A moment longer, and Dick can't pretend that the smile on Jason's mouth doesn't make him soften. Lets his shoulders lose some of their tension, let's his arm reach out to lay his fingers across Jason's palm. He can't help it- it's been a long time, since he'd seen such an expression on Jason. Belongs more closely to a knobby-kneed teenager in a loud coloured costume, than it does to the man before him]

It suits you. [Happy Birthday]

( there had been several years where a smile was the absolute furthest thing from his mind. where he had almost gained the permanent scowl lines on his forehead to match bruce's own. but he's learned to be softer. learned to smile again, even if he usually covers it with snarky grins. and today's a pretty good day, one worth using up a smile or two.

fingers trace over bandages for a moment, before he drops dick's hand back down. there's nothing else hurt on him: dick isn't sporting the bruises that jason is, he's fine. and it's easy enough to tell where these bandaids came from: the embroidery is perfect, but he imagines it's been a while since dick's tried his hand at it. )

Well, you know how much I like my jokes about the incident.

( dick knows the one. there were crowbars, some really painful hits. . )

It's probably my new favorite thing.

I know.

[It's not quite as amused as Jason's own words. There's a part of Dick still, that can't stomach the mention- can't stomach something that had affected him so deeply, had outlined every singular moment he'd failed Jason- and treat it like it was worth nothing more than the funny page in the back of the newspaper. But as long as no one's getting hurt- Jason or anyone else- he equally can't find it in himself to try and change the way Jason is choosing to deal with it.

When he gets his hand back, he recrosses his arms, though it's clear that this time around, it's more for an ease of standing in a comfortable position, than it is for appearing defensive, closed off]

That's awfully high praise. [But his mouth is stretching into a full smile, bigger than any he's given his brother in years, wide and meant sincerely] I'm glad.

( everyone knows that jason todd has absolutely shit coping mechanisms. makes jokes of everything to keep it from hurting him worse. if he can laugh about it, it won't cause an unpleasant ache in his chest. the jacket's fucking great, dick has a great sense of humor when he tries and jason definitely does appreciate it.

maybe not as much as he appreciates seeing that smile, though. it's bright, soft. not edged with stress or hesitation. dick is smiling wide and means it wholeheartedly. which only causes jason's to widen even more in response.

because dick isn't pissed at him. isn't ready to snap. is being pleasant and not waiting for the other shoe to drop. and jason's doing his damned best not to drop it. )

You know me, I've got to keep to my aesthetic. ( now he's being a snarky bitch, but it's meant in fun instead of to be an ass. ) This definitely fixes the problem I was having with the popular fashion statement of this year: a lack of sarcasm printed on shit. You've saved me.

Right. That's what I was trying to do.

[It's soft, and the smile doesn't lessen- but something flickers across his eyes, for just a moment. He saved Jason from a fashion nightmare, but wasn't able to save him in any way that actually mattered. Not when he was a teenager- and not when he'd wanted to put on the cowl.

But Dick breathes easy, and let's the comment pass. Jason hadn't meant anything by it- and it wasn't the point. The point is Jason is standing before him, loose limbed and smiling wider than he has in years, alive and present for his birthday. Here to share a portion of it with Dick- something he'd never expected to happen]

It's not quite print though. Think I should work on that? [He's sure he could figure out how to press something on a t-shirt if he had to]

( jason is softer than he has been in a while. there's a lot of shit stirring under the surface, but for the purpose of not fucking up his shit with dick, he--tries not to let it out. tries just to be a little more gentle. his bad boy image doesn't earn him any favors with grayson, nor with bruce himself. what dick wants is someone who is softer, who is more open, doesn't hide shit and act like an asshole.

which is what he's aiming for. )

No, no. ( idly, raising a hand up to clasp dick on the shoulder as jason starts walking. starts leading him off and out of the safehouse, if dick will let him. ) This's perfect. It adds character, I like it.

( dick fucked up his own fingers for it. that means more to jason than anything else. it could have been the shittiest put together jacket ever but that dick would put his own fingers at risk? means everything. )

[The injuries sustained aren't significant- so Dick doesn't pay them the same mind as Jason does. He's bandaged them mostly for the purpose of keeping them clean, of using the tension to dull some of the throbbing pain at being used. But the skin will close over in a day or two, the pain will ease in around the same amount of time- and it's a small thing for the result.

A beautiful piece of embroidery, even if the humour in it may be lacking, to some. And the way that Jason's pleased with it. Happier to have this, something Dick had put hours of time in, than he's sure he'd have been, had Dick marked the day with a beer he'd wheedled off someone else. Or with anything he could have picked up that vaguely might have held Jason's interest, with the minimal credits he'd accumulated.

The appreciation that seems so genuine, is one of the reasons that Dick doesn't shrug the hand clasping onto his shoulder off almost as immediately as it lands. There isn't any exposed skin, but he can't deny the idea of the contact is unsettling for similar reasons, and let's Jason lead him out]

Well- I suppose that's all that matters, doesn't it? [That you like it, that you're happy. It's the simple things, that Dick wants to squirrel away and keep]

( he and dick are still on rocky terms, jason knows. they're still dancing around each other trying to figure out where the limits lie. where the line is. it's--hard to discern. they're both different, jason is different than expected. but he figures: if he can be open enough about himself. let dick see passed the outer shell that makes up the persona of jason todd--they'll be fine. that's what dick grayson wants, isn't it. to know what's under the bad boy exterior. to know what jason is really about.

and as much as he fucking hates to show it, he will. for this, for dick to accept him. it's worth the risk. it's hot as hell outside but he's leading dick into it anyway. leading him down the street to a little coffee shop. not a bar like jason would usually be found in, but something a little. softer. a nice place that dick would feel comfortable chilling in, instead of the rowdy places jason prefers to frequent. )

How've you been lately? ( look at this nice soft question from this nice soft jason. look at how hard he's trying. ) Get up to any shenanigans?

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those who died are justified;

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