sweet vermouth, now you're telling me the truth —

[evite]

WHO: cassian andor (evasives), daisy johnson (evite), illya kuryakin (kgbs), & jyn erso (realists)
WHERE: the barbie dream house
WHEN: approximately november 12
WHAT: a game of "never have i ever".
NOTES OR WARNINGS: rated pg-13 for inappropriate language.

Comments

[evite]

[ from behind his hand on her mouth, daisy stubbornly insists: ] They don't care!

[ but it's muffled and unintelligible, and his grip is sturdy and firm... which means only one thing.

she has to lick his hand. because she is a child. ]

[kgbs]

[ gross why would you. he yanks his hand away and gets to his feet because while he could wipe his hand on his shirt, he is not that type of person and has to go wash it and dry it appropriately even if...

he's not going to be tmi thank you very much. he's only gone a moment before he steps back out, making a face in her direction. ]

You are intoxicated and I am sleeping on the couch tonight.

[ you hand licker. ]

[realists]

[ jyn was already on the floor, but now she's on the floor laughing because illya's reaction seems so out of proportion for daisy and jyn's naturally easy banter. ]

Did she lick your hand?

[ this is Too Hilarious ] You're my second favorite person, Daisy.

[evite]

[ her nose wrinkles, affronted. illya can do whatever, but how dare jyn. ]

Bitch, I'm your sister!

[ ERGO, YOUR FAVORITE. ]

[evasives]

[ sometimes the universe is looking out for him?? he avoids follow up, excellent, and instead he just gets to fondly watch jyn have a laughing attack on the floor. ]

[ maybe he'll take another sip, even though there's nothing to drink to. he's drinking for illya's poor red face and trying not to himself be amused by his embarrassment, because daisy's right, cassian really doesn't care. solidarity can only go so far illya before he laughs at your overreactions. ]

[kgbs]

You are drunk.

[ and that is a fact.

he settles back on the other side of the couch, ignoring his drink so he can stretch out and cover his face with his arm so he can be alone with his embarassment. ]

[realists]

[ jyn's hand smacks back to whack cassian's knee. ]

He is my favorite and Illya is your favorite and we are each other's second favorite friend and first favorite sister.

[ she points at daisy aggressively before she turns back to cassian, eyes narrowing. ]

And when it wasn't a mission?

[evasives]

[ oh, he's her favorite? has he ever been anyone's favorite before, except maybe his parents. it leaves him feeling very warm for a second, though it could be the alcohol. ]

[ it's ruined when she swings it back around to making moves on people, and he wrinkles his nose. ]

Just... people. Other rebels. Evidently I am not very approachable, so it was easier for me to take the first step a lot of the time. Why are names necessary?

[evite]

[ as she crawls into illya's lap whether or not he fucking wants her to (because he is her favorite and she loves him and she wants to fucking cuddle, goddamnit): ]

Because Jyn wants to make a voodoo doll of them and then drop them off the balcony, duh.

[ jealous cow sister ]

[realists]

[ daisy isn't wrong but jyn isn't going to say that, shrugging expansively and leaning her head against cassian's knee. she can fight those rebels herself anyway. ]

Let her in Illya, it's cold outside.

[kgbs]

[ don't tell him what to do!

but fine, he moves his arm away from his face and curls it around her, bringing her closer to him and further onto his lap. she is just lucky he likes her as much as he does.

loves her. whatever.

he sighs and closes his eyes, content to listen to them talk whilst he does nothing but play human chair for his girlfriend. ]

[evasives]

[ why would jyn want to throw them off a balcony??? ]

[ he frowns down at her head leaning on him. it feels warm but he feels kind of uncomfortable anyway. ]

[ he mumbles it: ] I do not keep a list.

[evite]

[ what if daisy johnson fell asleep right now? she's not going to. but she could. ]

He probably keeps a [ bad british accent ] dossier. Because he's so sneaky.

[ drunk bitches and broken clocks are right twice a day. ]

[realists]

A dossier?

[ with a real british accent. ]

He had a dossier about me. What did it say? Does not play well with others? Oh, I have another. I have never broken anyone out of prison.

[kgbs]

[ illya does not drink to that one because he has not broken anyone out of prison either. he is the one who typically helps put people into prison. ]

My dossier says that I have an Oedipus complex.

[ he is not drunk but apparently he is going to share anyway. ]

And it says I have other things as well.

[ stupid dossier. ]

[evite]

Yeah, but it's, like... [ daisy makes a vague hand gesture. it's a good thing she doesn't have her drink anymore. ] Not the fuck your mom kind.

[ succinct and also true ]

[evasives]

[ he hUFFS!!! there's no compilation of names of the people he's slept with that's too creepy!! and part two of the huff is taking another drink because man he's broken a lot of people out of prison, jyn was just the latest. ]

My personal dossier is classified, and I do not keep any others on people I will never see again.

[ so there. ]

And we would not be here today if I did not know how to break people out of prison. [ JYN ERSO. ]

[realists]

[ ignores the prison thing even though she brought it up. ]

's that why you had a dossier on me? Looking to keep me around?

[kgbs]

It says I have a personality disorder too.

[ there are two different conversations happening now since illya has no idea what jyn's dossier said or why she cares that much. it is just information for information's sake. ]

That could be true.

[evite]

[ truly, no one is listening. it is the drunk girl's time to level sage advice on all parties. ]

He likes you, stupid. [ and as for illya: ] You were an angry Russian who needed to get laid. Now you are a fighty Russian who gets laid a lot.

[ yes. much better. affirmative! ]

[kgbs]

Why are you in such an oversharing mood?

[ the walls were soundproof. they didn't need to know this! ]

Who wins the game? I think I win the game.

[ #competitive. ]

[evasives]

It helped us realize he had to break you out of prison to start. [ swings it back around to prison!! casually ignores what daisy says about him liking her! ofc he likes jyn, she's his best friend. his platonic war buddy. ]

[ illya they already know you're banging, it doesn't matter! ]

I contest that. I am still very coherent. [ unlike certain someones. that rhyme with dyn and jaisy. ]

[evite]

[ with an air of drunken belligerence: ] No. Cassian loses because he's in denial.

[ thus, illya wins. if she had a crown, she would put it on his head. instead, he just gets a peck on the forehead that's probably not totally on-point for hitting its target. maybe she smooches his eyelid instead. who knows?

not daisy. ]

[realists]

[ the door buzzes and jyn abruptly stands up which considering how much she quickly drank means she wobbles like a weeble and almost trips over cassian's leg. ]

I'll get it!

[ as if anyone else had given any indication they would do the same. she wobbles straight to the door and opens it, beaming at the night security guard standing at the door holding the pizza she ordered when she was still lucid enough to order and pay. ]

Thank you, Finch. [ jyn wanders around at night enough thanks to insomnia that they have gotten to know each other. she is very likable.

"You're welcome, Miss Erso." ]

Oh, piss off. [ and she closes the door in his face as he laughs at her. time to kill marcos. but later. now she turns to face her roommates. ] I win because you were all too stupid to order pizza.

[evite]

I want pizza!

[ it is the incoherent-sounding shriek of a girl who practically bolts upright, limbs flailing as she tries to pull herself off of illya... only to wobble all the way down into face-planting onto the sofa.

she's not getting up. honestly, it's a miracle she stayed up this long. go on without her, she's out like a light. ]