meadowlarklogs | Do I look like the leader of this merry band of misfits?

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Do I look like the leader of this merry band of misfits?

WHO: Marian Hawke + you
WHERE: Fighting rings, dreams
WHEN: March 15ish-31stish
WHAT: Hawke living her life, beating people up, dreaming horrible things, the usual
NOTES OR WARNINGS: Body horror, loss of parent, terrorism, mass death, violence, woohoo

1. Fighting Rings, pre-and-post-dreams

[Mid-month, Hawke is having a grand time throwing herself time and time again into the fighting rings. She wins more than she loses, and while it'll take some time before she becomes a real name, it's growing by the fight. It's not just that she wins, it's that even when she loses she makes it an interesting experience to watch. She's fast and witty, often making snide remarks even when punched in the face, and it gets people's attention.

Often after a match, she'll end up at the bar; if she's won, there will be people around her chatting and she chats amiably right back, and if she's lost, she'll make fun of herself to anyone who will listen as she wipes the blood and sweat off herself. Anyone who wants to come meet her or talk about fighting, she's welcoming.

Later toward the end of the month, after a few of these dreams have started to haunt her, she will start being more reckless and grimmer during fights. She will be ruthless, brutal, and come nearer to killing people than she probably should be, but stop in time. She's far less friendly and there's a darkness to her than before, often storming off without a word.]

2. The one good memory! The Hanged Man!

[The Hanged Man is a medieval-appearing tavern in the heart of Kirkwall that gets busy during the night with all kinds of warriors, mercenaries, and sometimes questionable thieves and assassins. But in that bar, everyone tries to calm their arses down. There's only an occasional bar fight, otherwise there's singing, dice and card playing, and general revelry.

The Champion's table is a particularly rowdy one. The group of misfits are often loud, mocking each other, and laughing. A lot of beer is put around and usually it's Varric telling a grand old story that the others are tearing apart. They're playing a game of Wicked Grace and Hawke gets up to go to the bar.

She's pulled up a pint of ale, in her typical clothes with her blades and armor strapped on, but otherwise casual. She watches them with a smile, comforted for now in watching instead of joining in.

3. Rest in Peace, Leandra Dreamscape - TW for parental death and body horror

[Hawke was frantic when she found out her mother was abducted by the hite-lily murderer, confronting the bastard in a place of his choosing. It wasn't a smart or safe plan, flying in there not knowing what came ahead of her, but it didn't matter. Gascard, who brought them there, betrayed the group and ended up with a crossbow in the throat to show for it. Varric and Anders flank Hawke in this memory, ready to help her at any cost, but none of them are prepared for what happens.

When Quentin reveals what happened to her mother, Hawke in this memory screams. Demons appear and she kills them, destroys everything in her path, covers the ground with the blood of anyone that gets in her way. After there's nothing left to kill, Leandra falls into her daughter's arms. A frankenstein creation of a woman now, she cannot survive, her body no longer animated with Quentin's death.

Instead of what truly happened, Hawke's mother does not speak of being proud, or of seeing her son Carver and her husband again. No, as Hawke cradles her, she tells her the worst things Hawke tells herself.] This was all your fault. First Carver and now me. You let them take Bethany, you destroyed our family. You destroyed Kirkwall. It should have been you. [She tenderly touches Hawke's face as tears fall down her face.] Everything would be better if you were never born.

4. Hawke Has Bad Taste In Men Dream - TW for murder and betrayal

[It starts out as something terrible but unfortunately very typical. Meredith and Orsino screaming at each other about Templars and Mages and Hawke just mostly being exhausted by it. All her companions are there too and she sighs, wondering when this is going to end, if ever. They're in a brightly lit coutyard and it seems like a deceptively nice day outside of the bickering.

Until Anders appears. Hawke turns to him when he arrives, and because this is a dream and not what truly happened, she speaks before he can.] Don't do it. Anders, Please. This time be different. This time. I love you, we can fix this. [She runs toward him but then the memory keeps playing and the Chantry explodes behind her, killing countless people. Hawke still doesn't know the number. Not from the explosion, not from the mayhem that came after. Perhaps she thinks if she heard the number she'd go mad.

The rest happens. Anders starts a war. Meredith threatens to murder all of the mages, Hawke has to stop her. These things move all around her as soldiers fight and die, and all she's left with is Anders. The others seem to disappear. He sits before her, back to her, and she puts a sword to his neck.]

I let you live, but I shouldn't have. [Tears coat her face as well as blood.] You broke me, you broke Kirkwall. This time I'll end you. [She makes as if to strike him, helpless and unarmed but more powerful than she'll ever be.]

***[OOC: Note that only difference in Anders scene is that Hawke does not say she would understand, she says 'that's a convenient excuse' but I could find no video that said that.]

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[ helena participates in the fighting rings herself, but she also gets a deep thrill out of just watching. she likes to bet on who she thinks will win, and most of the time she makes a pretty good guess. ]

[ this woman now, named hawke she is fairly certain, is very entertaining, quipping and brawling and helena cheers and laughs the whole match through. she doesn't like watching tv through her head, so coming to the rings is the next best thing. ]

[ when the woman wins yet again, helena is cheering with the rest of the crowd, front row and leaping excitedly as she throws her hands up in the air. ]

One hundred points! [ it's definitely not the scoring system, but that's what she's decided. so there. ]

[Hawke takes energy from the crowd so if the crowd is loving her, she loves to showboat. She usually just kills people, so there are times when she knows she could kill someone easily, and it seems boring to simply punch them. So of course she has to have fun with it. She notices Helena cheering at her and flashes a bright grin at her. When she gives her the points, she blows a kiss at her, and gets sent off to rest up before the next one.

She is generally a friendly person so once she grabs a drink she looks for the woman in question, having recognized her around here for a bit now. Hawke is always very aware of her surroundings although she doesn't make it obvious, and she knows the woman's a fighter herself. So she comes about with an impressive big glass of ale and waves at Helena.]

Hello there! Thanks for all the cheering, it makes it much better.

[ she pretends to scoop up the kiss from midair and eat it, her logic heretofore unknown, but she does spend the rest of the match cheering even louder. she gets a couple odd looks from the people nearby, but clearly doesn't give a single fuck. ]

[ helena is mostly watching for whoever the next round is, but she doesn't miss hawke approaching, a wide and delighted smile blooming on her face. she claps, hands raised up high and laughing. ]

You are very good fighter. Very good at putting on show.

[Hawke only laughs at that; hey blown kisses are meant to be caught, after all. She always loves to see people who are able to play with her, since she's a jokester at heart. The more serious others are, the more she feels compelled to mock them, and she's really trying to only get into fights in the ring.

Hawke lifts her free hand and wiggles her fingers at Helena in greeting; she doesn't shake anymore. The idea of putting her odd little state of emotion in anyone else's hands alarms her. Although on the whole, her surface emotions are very easy, it's the deep dark stuff she'd rather not spread.]

Thank you, I'd better be. I've been fighting since I was big enough to pick up a sword. [So around six. That's when her father realized she was going to make trouble somewhere sooner or later, so he might as well hone her.] The hard part is not killing people.

[After a pause, she winces and shrugs.] I've been told not to say things like that to people. Stabbing is far less constant here. I'm Hawke. Like the bird, with an E at the end. [They do announce that during fights, but this is proper!]

Is sword how you prefer to be fighting? [ swords don't seem very big in new amsterdam, though it's not like guns are easily accessible either. that's why her gifted guns are tucked away safely! :) ]

[ the mention of killing people goes completely over helena's head, or the notion doesn't matter to her. it could be both! she shrugs it off, unbothered. ]

I am Helena. I have also been fighting for long time, but I never learned how to use sword. When I stab, it was usually with knives.

Yes, I use mostly blades. [Ah, someone who understands. Hawke doesn't know what the guns really are, although she's been informed in a general way what they are. She's never been good at long distance. She does far better when she can come in close, like in a fighting ring.]

I have these glorious twin longswords. [She sighs, feeling a pang of loss.] I usually dual wield them but sometimes I grab a broadsword and just smash. [Those were the good days. Fenris is far better with a broadsword though. She misses her daggers too. Alas.]

What do you use if not swords? One of those .... [She wrinkles her nose and wiggles her fingers.] I don't remember the name, something that shoots fire and steel but is not magic.

I can use anything. [ it's not really an exaggeration? she was trained, obviously, but helena has used all manner of things when it comes down to a fight. her own hands have served her best of all in the end. forks, pillows, pencils, helena has weaponized all manner of tools. ]

[ still, she listens with great interest about the swords. she maybe has always wanted to use a sword. ]

Do you mean guns? [ gunpowder, she supposes, is kind of like fire. ] I use these guns, but they are not common here. Hard to get. I can use knives also - those are much easier to find in this city. As long as I have my hands, I am good in fight.

A girl after my own heart. [Hawke has been known to use just about anything in a fight, although he doesn't need to in the ring since it's not to the death. She hopes she doesn't get rusty from her particular brand of creativity, with this as her only outlet.

She snaps her fingers and nods.] That's right, guns. [She knows explosives and the like, so to have something like that inside of an item sounds extremely useful. She'd like to see one someday, even if it isn't really her taste of weapon.]

This lass named Daisy said she could make me a sword, if I got the proper materials. [Hawke jumped at the chance. The problem is she doesn't know if there's any type of long blades around here or a blacksmith that could help her get the proper blade. The hilt might be easier to put together.] I might end up settling for a crude simple one. Doesn't feel right without them.

[ helena lets out a quiet, delighted sort of laugh, clearly enjoying this conversation about weapons and fighting. ] Guns are more better for distance. Up close is for fists and knives.

Daisy? [ she perks up immediately, filing the name away. if she can make a sword maybe she can make more knives. guns are trickier, she thinks, if only because of the need for ammunition. ] Maybe she can make me knife. I do not need weapon, but I still like to be having one with me. Just in case.

[ she already has two knives, but it would be nice to carry a smaller one, something she can tuck away and hide. ]

Yeah, my best friend's a long distance fighter. He has a crossbow that's the love of his life. I'm fairly certain he keeps it in his bed with him. [She wouldn't be surprised!] I'm at my best up close. I typically run a bit of a distance if I'm up against someone stronger. Faster, smarter, it'll win if timed right. [She defeated the Arishok, probably the most dangerous opponent she's ever had. He was lethal, brilliant, violent. If he didn't have to fight her to the death, they might've even gotten on.]

Don't know if I remember the name from the network where we've spoken. Daisy .... [Hawke snaps her fingers.] Johnson. [Hawke's assumed that Helena's one of them as she didn't blink an eyelash when she brought up magic. No strange look or wondering at her sanity. She's terrible at being subtle!]

If she can make me one, most likely she can make more. Let's bring back blades, ignore the guns.

I can use crossbow also. Is not my favorite, but can still be fun.

[ she does not particularly want to get into how most of her fighting was aimed at... killing people. literally assassinating them. guns are easier to transport, but arrows work for sniping too - just not as far, she supposes. distance killing was her modus operandi, simply because she didn't want them to see her face. ]

Daisy Johnson. [ she commits it to memory, determined to maybe get some more goods. ] Blades would be much easier to carry in this Earth. They do not like guns here, but knives would be very easy to hide. Stick in your pocket and go undetected.

[Hawke's used to being from a violent enough place that people really don't blink too much at someone being a hired killer or a renowned killer. Her entire fame comes from that, although they like to dress it up real pretty with the Champion talk. It's not as if she'd kill every person who crossed her path, she has some general rules, but it's kill or be killed a lot of the time. Here she really isn't concerned about being killed. It's almost unnerving.]

Absolutely. And good bracers ... iron knuckles. [She stretches out her fingers from a fist and then back again. She could definitely use something heavy on them to punch, outside of the ring of course. That was hardly sporting!]

It would come in handy the next time some mercenaries or monsters try to come at us, eh?

[ some people don't like murder! helena is trying to figure that out on an individual level more than a broad city level. she's not actively keeping it a secret so much as... it doesn't necessarily figure into the conversation seamlessly. ]

[ she lets out a quick laugh, holding up her own hand in a fist, mimicking the movements that hawke does. ] Iron knuckles, yes. Those are very useful. I am thinking they would be much easier to hide also.

[ knives and guns and more are hard to deny as a weapon, but iron knuckles? if designed properly, they could look like jewelry. ]

They give us powers, but I prefer to rely on my own weapons and my own fighting.

[Hawke loves talking to people for a whole lot of reasons, but she does get her best ideas bouncing off someone else. She wouldn't have thought of the idea of iron knuckles were she not speaking about it in this way, and now it's in her head as a good option. Not as good as a sword in her hand, certainly, but it might be easier to come by as a set of rings.]

I haven't figured mine out yet. My sister and father were magic users, so I suppose I'm too used to being without them that I don't know how to tap into any.

[She supposes that Bethany would immediately be able to figure out hers, having lived with powers her entire life. It must be nice. But Hawke also hasn't gone out of her way to try and figure them out. She has a feeling they'll pop up when she's about to die, like any good unexpected save at the knick of time that she's rather famous for.]

I don't plan on leaning on them though, they can be a crutch. I know many a mage who only knows magic and not how to fight, so once you get around the magic, they're sitting ducks.

[ she almost just... shows hers off right then and there, but then she remembers their chests glow, and doing so in public is maybe not smart?? silena is rubbing off on her. ]

I make copies. [ which seems too on the nose for her, but she certainly isn't daring to think about that. ] Not real. Illusions. These powers do not exist on regular earth, so I am also not wanting to rely on them.

And illusions cannot punch. [ the worst part! ]

Hopefully you are finding yours when you are not in the fighting ring.

Copies of yourself that are illusions? Can they do anything or are they distraction tactics?

[Hey, distraction tactics aren't a bad thing! It can be effective to throw something shiny at someone so they're distracted enough to be stabbed. Hawke is full of tricks and has zero qualms with doing what Aveline would call 'dishonorable' tactics like throwing sand in someone's eyes or doing whatever it took to win. Aveline had to deal with all of them being that way, poor thing.]

They said it's supposed to have something to do with your inner self or something like that.

[She's using the general we because enough people have said it at her. She has yet to find out what that means or how to utilize it.]

Maybe I can make my hands into blades. I would love that. Being a walking weapon would be brilliant.

I have not tried to make myself yet. [ she would try it here, but that seems like a bad idea. ] I have mostly tried with objects. Can move them around a little bit, takes practice.

[ she wrinkles her nose. a copy of herself... that would be a great distraction. yes she is aware that technically she wouldn't need a power if any of her sisters were here. maybe that's where the inner self comes from on her end. did someone know and think it would be funny?? ]

[ helena holds up her hand, extending her fingers like knives, her face lighting up at the idea. ] You would never be without weapon. Would be dangerous surprise when throwing punch.

Illusion magic can be very useful but it takes practice, according to my sister, as you have to envision everything in your mind.

[She's just going to call it magic, alright, it's special abilities inborn into them in this world that is supernatural, magic! Hawke's face lights up too and she nods, wiggling her fingers.]

Now that would be worth it. I wouldn't have to carry around a blade, I could just make them.

[She's a dreamer. She wishes it could be true. Hawke frowns though and shrugs.]

I should have asked Bethany more about how she does magic, I have thought of elemental magic like hers, imagined snow or ice or lightning, but no luck so far.

This is like what I try to do now. Picture duplicate, then it appears.

[ it's easier with smaller objects, but she's working on the size!! ]

If hands could not be weapons, would be nice to create weapons instead of just pretend weapons. [ she wrinkles her nose. too many repetitions of the same word makes it sound funny. ] Bethany is your sister? Does she have illusion magic or this other one?

Oh yes, ideally they would be real weapons and not illusions, but perhaps some time you can come up with one to scare people off or fool them to make a good getaway.

[Hawke has zero trouble running from a situation. She doesn't consider it cowardly and also wouldn't care if it was, because she's a survivor. If living means running, she'll do it without a question. Or it'll give her more time and space to come up with a good plan. Ask the qunari how dangerous she can be if she runs long enough to strategize.

Her gaze softens, thinking about Bethany, and she nods.]

She's my little sister. Although she's much wiser than I am. [And more mature. And smart. Hawke adores her.] She leans toward elemental magic, so fire and earth, water. She likes fire the most. But she knows some illusions.

[Hawke shrugs.] The circle, where the put mages, has a lot of different types of magic being taught, so she's learned a lot.

This is good idea. Would be good way to create surprises.

[ helena doesn't necessarily like running away, but she too does understand the value of escaping if it's the right call to make. live to fight another day. the living part is important! ]

[ ah! sisters! helena's relationship with her own sister is still a work in progress, and as much as she wants to fight her twin, the fondness she has for her is enormous. she looks similarly pleased to be talking about siblings. ] I have twin sister. But we do not have magic on regular Earth.

Is she being here? Some people have powers with these elements. She could be expert.

Oh a twin! Bethany's a twin too. Or, well, I suppose she was.

[All these years later and it still hurts, like a stab right to her heart. Carver, brave and bold and ridiculous and only eighteen. Bethany's managed but Hawke knows she still misses her other half.]

Our brother died years ago. So it's just us now.

[Very much so, with their parents dead too. Except she's not with Bethany, she's here. Hawke also likes talking about siblings though. Bethany's the closest to her heart, and she misses her dearly.]

She isn't. And as much as I'd love to see her, she'd probably hate it, being without her powers.

[They're as fundamental to Bethany as Bethany is to her sister, essentially. Only Hawke has already learned how to live without her, to let them have separate lives.]

What's your sister like?

My twin is Sarah. Did not know she was sister until most recently. We were separated as babies, and now we are back together.

[ which is really the simplest, most unassuming story, especially when one considers their first real meeting involved sarah impaling her. good times, just sisters being siblings. ]

I also think she would hate this place. She has daughter, would not want to be apart from her.

I am sorry for your brother. Is always sad to lose family. [ now that helena has one, maybe, could have one with sarah, she thinks she would do anything for the chance to keep it. ]

I'm glad you found each other, then. Life's always better with sisters, in my opinion, even if we don't always get along.

[That is putting it a little mildly as she and Bethany have had some serious ups and downs, but neither of them have ever doubted each other's love or loyalty. The world just isn't very kind to mages, and even Hawke couldn't save her from that reality.]

It was sad, he was only eighteen. My world isn't a gentle one. It's violent and unfair much of the time.

[This isn't said in an unhappy way, more like the type of thing you accept and move on from. It's how the world is. She is realistic about that. Hawke hears her name and turns her head in that direction.]

Ooo looks like I have some winnings to pick up. [She grins.] Find me again later, I'll buy you another drink.

Is always better, yes. My sister and I do not always get along also. Just how family is.

[ lots of violence between these twins, between impalement, shootings, handcuffs... it's fine. they're learning to be siblings for real! helena and family is a new concept with or without a twin. ]

Yes, go get winnings. Very important part of match. I will watch for your next fight, Hawke like the bird!

[ no last name, so she just tacks on the bird. that's her name to helena now evidently. hawke like the bird. ]

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Do I look like the leader of this merry band of misfits?

1.

sorry for the wait, hiatus-y but ps I LOVE ORPHAN BLACK

np but aahhhhHH ITS ONE OF MY FAVE SHOWS

MINE TOO. I miss it.

me too it's been a void in my life

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maybe wrap on this, we can do a more recent one soon? :D

sounds good to me! :'D